I’ve never considered myself an angry person. I still don’t. But in the last few years, it’s been a struggle of mine, and that’s tough to admit. As there are very viable reasons why I’m angry, I recently discovered that if I don’t healthily process and deal with my anger, it either gets all blocked up in my heart and causes bitterness, or I express it and the person I’m looking at in the mirror isn’t who I want to be.
Many moms are angry right now.
We’re angry about the state of the world. That the food we buy at the grocery store is unaffordable and slowly killing us instead of nurturing our bodies. We’re angry by all these mystery illnesses that keep us buying the next best supplement or doing the next big detox that we saw on TikTok the other day.
We’re angry that we can’t send our children to school without wondering what lies they will be indoctrinated with today. We’re angry that we don’t have a minute to spare in the day for ourselves because we have unwillingly become a part of a rat race system that makes us stressed, tired, disinterested, and impatient with our children.
We’re angry that our children aren’t in tune with nature and have lost their imaginations from staring mindlessly at screens for hours on end. We’re angry that our husbands are more interested in the contents of their phones than the hearts of their families.
We’re angry that the people around us seem to have dug a nice big hole in the sand for their heads and have decided to drink the cool aid that’s seeping in from the bottom. We’re angry that we can no longer trust our country’s leaders and possibly never should have. We’re angry that we’re discontented with what we have — always feel this need for more, better, and bigger things where the grass is greener.
We’re angry that our hearts have gotten all blocked up with fear of the unknown world our children will grow up in. We’re angry that the life we imagined we would have couldn’t be farther from our own reality. We’re angry that we don’t own 10 acres with livestock and chickens because we’re not sure if we can afford to feed our children much longer. We’re angry that we can’t openly discuss our values or morals without being called old-school or worse.
We’re angry that we can’t seem to stop scrolling through the garbage our social media feeds us because if we do, we might miss out. We’re angry that we are not the women we want to be but feel helpless as to how to turn things around.
Why the world is the way it is.
The truth is, most of us, dads as well, are pretty angry right now, and rightfully so. And as anger is an understandable reaction to the clown world we’re living in, it’s not where God wants us to stay. Our souls, spirits, minds, and bodies were created for love, kindness, connection, community, peace, joy, and hope.
Sometimes, we get glimpses of how it’s supposed to be, and it gives us a little more hope and strength to get through the week. Then, we find new ways to cope to get through a little bit more. Eventually, those coping mechanisms stop working, and we’re left thirsting for more. We try the next big anti-inflammation trend, like ice plunging, red light therapy, deep breathing, fad diets, etc., but then most of us realize that while it may be helping, it’s not penetrating the thing that is the most inflamed and sickly — our hearts.
The second half of Deuteronomy 28 describes what happens to a disobedient nation. If you live in the Western world, you’ll see many parallels, including inflammation, fevers, mold, cursed soil, cursed flocks, pestilence, confusion, frustration, incurable disease, husband against wife, father against son, mother against daughter, trafficking, hunger, thirst, and the list goes on. If you have time, read it and allow the hairs on the back of your neck to stand on end and perhaps awaken your mind as to why our world may be in the state it’s in.
We have forsaken God in our modern society, even if we ourselves have not forsaken Him. But unfortunately, we live in this world. Fortunately, we can do something about it.
Although we may not be able to buy farmland or stop our leaders from destroying our country, we can take a deep breath and recognize that we have our own little world to run, our own little hearts to nurture, and our own lives to live because God still cares about us and will never leave us or forsake us.
As children of God, we have a superpower we can tap into, so to speak, and it has nothing to do with changing our diets or raising our own food. By all means, if you can, start your own off-grid homestead and homeschool your kids. That’s what we’re doing. But there is something that has to be done on a heart level if you’re going to get through this.
Surrender the control of your circumstances and take control of your thoughts.
There is a real good vs. evil battle going on for the hearts and souls of mankind, and it’s time we stop believing lies and start believing truth. In Christ, we are promised freedom, joy, peace, hope, and love. In Him, we have everything we need; we need only recognize the Holy Spirit inside us so we can stand against the powers that be and finally experience the joy that is promised to us. Don’t allow the enemy to steal your joy. I know this is easier said than done, but at the end of the day, it’s always our choice. Surrender control to a loving God and start pointing the finger at the real enemy. It’s not your kids, it’s not your spouse, it’s not your friends or family members, it’s not God. It’s the prince of the power of the air. Satan. The Devil. Whatever you want to call him, he hates God, and he hates God’s people. Don’t allow your heart to grow cold. Guard it. Teach your children to do the same.
Replace the bad with the good. Be in the Word and in prayer DAILY.
There’s nothing better for your mind and mood than memorizing the Word of God and praying continually.
“do not be anxious about anything, sbut in everything by prayer and supplication twith thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. 7 And uthe peace of God, vwhich surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” Phillipians 4:6-7
“Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you.” 1 Thes. 5 16-18
Visualize Daily
One of the best things you can do for your mind body and mood is visualizing. I begin this practice the minute I wake up. Here’s how.
- Recognize the lie you’re believing and call it for what it is. “I’m believing I’m not enough, and I have to be perfect. That’s a lie.”
- Speak out who you are in Christ — “I am a child of God, loved and cherished and chosen.”
- “I CHOOSE to believe God’s truth about myself and others.” State that truth or quote a verse that combats the lie you’re believing. Ex. “For there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus.” to combat the lie that God is punishing you in some way.
- Distract yourself with deep breathing, counting backward, going on a walk, etc.
- Spend at least 15 min visualizing yourself and speaking out loud about a past beautiful memory, a vacation spot you loved, or a brand new place you’d like to go. It can be anything. Hiking, canoeing, staying at a resort…Be detailed and descriptive. Include words on how you feel and what you look like, what it smells like. “I am healthy, joyful, and content. I smell the ocean and the salty air.” You can even include Jesus. Speaking, walking, boating with Him. One of my favorite visualizations is having a sailing day with Jesus. Just me and Him and the ocean.
- Thank God for the good things in your life.
This is a modified version of something I learned from the program Limbic System Rewire, all about rewiring your brain. It’s incredibly helpful in kicking your body out of flight or fight mode, which usually ails people with anxiety, chronic illness and pain, depression, food sensitivities, etc. The trick is to flood your body with happy hormones and start rewiring negative thinking. There’s a ton of science behind this strategy, and it originated in scripture and it’s how God is able to have fellowship with us.
“4 Rejoice in the Lord always; again I will say, rejoice. 5 Let your reasonableness be known to everyone. The Lord is at hand; 6 do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. 7 And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
8 Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things. 9 What you have learned and received and heard and seen in me—practice these things, and the God of peace will be with you.” Philippians 4:4-9
When we are walking in the flesh and believing lies, we close the door for God to speak to us and bless us with His peace and joy. When we are operating in the Spirit and believing truth, we can experience God’s love and wisdom. Negative thinking shapes how we view God, and we begin to paint Him in a false light.
Throwing Off the Stones of Bitterness
Bitterness and unforgiveness will make your heart feel like it’s made of stone. The Bible references the heart in Scripture almost 1000 times. Guard your heart. Seek a pure heart. Don’t let bitterness into your heart. So on and so forth. We see this hardening of heart clearly portrayed the many times the Israelites went through trials. Learn from them, and don’t allow your circumstances or grudges against others to harden your heart toward God.
Protect it and keep it with all you have. Do daily check-ins on your heart and ask yourself if what you believe is going to create a clean heart or a bitter one.
How to apply it in this broken world.
Back to being angry about our circumstances and the world at hand. The truth is, there’s not much we can do about the direction our world is going in. Obviously, you can vote (but who knows if that will really do anything), and you can make efforts to stand up for the truth and call out what is evil. You can take your children out of an indoctrinating environment and homeschool. You can start growing your own food and raising your own animals for meat. You can unplug yourself from society the best you can in order to protect what’s yours. You can do all of those things. But if you allow your heart to be torn apart and grow bitter and weary by not filtering it all through the lens of “But God is still in control.” You will find yourself worse off than ever.
As we prepare physically and mentally for what’s to come, our spiritual life should take first priority if we are to live the life that God intended for us. He never said it would be easy; in fact, He said we would face trial and tribulation in this life. “But take heart, for I have overcome the world.”
Hold fast to the hope we have in Christ. When you operate in this way, your anger becomes righteous (be angry at the sin, not the sinner), your heart is protected, your mind is clear, your fellowship is connected, your family is peaceful, and your life is full, despite the fire burning all around you.
I’m not speaking from an “I have this all together” perspective. I have to DAILY practice these truths or I get sidelined pretty quickly. But this is truly the only hope we have to actually experience the peace and joy that God desires for us.
Most of what Paul writes in the New Testament was when he was being persecuted and imprisoned. He truly understood what it meant to consider the trials he faced all joy because he knew how to abide in Christ and walk in the Spirit. We don’t have to be imprisoned by our circumstances. We don’t have to live a miserable life, even when things aren’t going so well. As I write this, I remind myself because this is and has been a struggle for me the past few years.
But I’m so grateful that I woke up and stopped trying to be comfortable at all costs. Instead, I realized that comfort would only distract me from doing the internal heart work that deepens my relationship with God.
If you’re going through a trial, it just might be a way that God is trying to reach you and remind you that without Him, there is no hope.
